Lord, this is so very hard.
Some days. . . . most days it feels like too much for our hearts to bear. It's too heavy. It's too painful. It's too deflating.
We see her suffer, and we feel helpless. We hold her hand and wince with her as she grasps her head in pain. We watch her struggle just to get a sip of juice to her mouth. We witness her body diminishing daily before our very eyes. Just 92 pounds now, but small as she may be, she is still so very significant. She is our wife, our mother, our sister, our friend. She is a mighty woman of God. She is a daughter of the King. Have mercy, Lord! We so desperately want to see her eyes sparkle again. We want to hear her laugh. We want to hold her hand and walk with her just because we love her and not because she can't take a step without our help. We know that this will take a miracle, but we also know that you are fully able to do this. You created her from nothing, and what an amazing job you did, God. She is a masterpiece! Surely you can also restore her. This is our prayer. We boldly ask for healing.
But we ask this understanding that you are sovereign and that your ways are higher than ours. We don't understand, but we trust. We don't like any of this, but we believe you have a greater plan than what we can see. Or at least, we want to believe. Lord, help our unbelief when it's difficult to see past the pain. Help us to trust that Jeremiah 29:11 is true, but that it is because of the promise of Heaven, not the temporary things of earth.
Thank you, Father, that you are not unfamiliar with grief. You have walked where we walk, and you did it on purpose. You volunteered for the anguish of watching your Son suffer, and you did it for us. Lord, may we remember your amazing and lavish grace. Give us a vision for Habakkuk 2:14 when the whole earth will be filled with your glory, and the radiance of your Son will be pressed into every corner. No more suffering. No more death. No more exhaustion. No more tears.
Lord, pour out wave upon wave of miraculous comfort onto Jeff and Mark and Ally. May they sense the fullness of your presence in a way they have never before experienced. Give wisdom as they continue to seek the best options for Anne's care and comfort. Give rest as they pour out themselves as her constant caretakers. Set their hearts at peace--a miracle in itself--the kind that can only come from you. Help the truth of Scripture to come alive inside their hearts throughout every day, that they might burn with a glorious hope that transcends every earthly thought.
HEAR OUR CRIES, LORD! Bind up our breaking hearts and ready us for whatever lies ahead. Help us to cling to the cross and rest in the finished work of Christ, and give us joy as we envision Anne embracing her Savior, whether that be months, years or decades from now. Thank you that no matter what her short-term future may be, her eternal future is with you. Hold us close, Jesus. We need you so desperately. Hold us close and make us whole.